Like this:

I have three rants I’m going to rant about for this particular piece, and all of them are quite the juice. Very secretly, many people think about these things already (except for the last one), although their “sensitivity” dissuades them from admitting it. So in that regard, I’ll put on the brave face and just say it out for all to hear.

ANNOYING THING #1 — The Jumping Picture Thingy

We're free! Wee!

Ok, never mind that I chose a random picture of some little boys–I say that if it’s available in the Internet, well then it’s available for you to use. I have a Michael Jackson joke there but in light of the King’s passing, I’m not gonna go there for now.

Anywho, what is up with all the people around the world suddenly deciding that it’s cool and appealing for your collective personas to be captured in film while suspended in mid-air!?  People, this was considered ok three years ago. Right now, the fad has run out of steam.

ANNOYING THING #2 — Self-Portraits from a Cellphone

This guy actually has the same argument. I'm really sorry for using your pic, dude.

I get it–everyone has the camera doodad built-in on their phones. Ok, that’s fine. But does every Friendster, Facebook, Twitter, $#!+ profile pic need to one taken from your cellular? Well, talk about vanity. If you’re going to upload a picture of you for everyone to see, can it atleast be one where I can’t see your extended arms and I can’t feel the struggle as you try to stretch those appendages further? Geez.

P.S. Webcam shots are annoying too. And way creepy.

ANNOYING THING #3 — The Book/Film Debacle

Ooo-lala Edward. Were you this grumpy in the book?

Annoying pictures aside, what irks me the most is hearing people complain about films by saying that “Oh. The movie bad because different from book. Yadayadayada.” Woah there, Einstein–you mean to say that the film adaptation didn’t follow the garguantan book word for word? Oh mein gott!

Well, jolly help me, but THAT IS HOW IT SHOULD BE! It’s called a film “adaptation” specifically because it only seeks to to show the basic premise, or the “spirit” of the book in question. A film is simply a different form of media, and not all the boring text and side-stories detailed in a book can’t possibly be translated to the big screen. Catch my drift?

This might be a tad touchy, but when people critique book-t0-film adaptations, aren’t they just pouncing on the chance to announce to the world that they READ? As if reading is a book is an accomplishment deserving of a medal. Get over it!

Advertisement